Suicides

Kate Spade, then Anthony Bourdain.

What do you do, when you feel a deep lost and understanding,

Every time someone decides, they’ve had enough?

For me, years of extreme Brain fog.

Years, of feeling physically exhausted,

Every second, of every day.

[No matter how much, I rest]

A life of depression.

Bipolar.

PTSD (Rape, Has devastated my life and many others)

Medication.

A Black woman, living in this World.

All reasons, that make life, less appealing.

Each time someone choices death over life,

I’m saddened.

I understand.

And it seems my meds stop working.

All I can think about is, not wanting to be here.

But, I won’t commit suicide.

I fear I would survive.

And be worst off.

I think more about, moving to one of those States.

Where you have the right to say when, you’ve had enough and you’re ready to go.

Ready to die.

No, I won’t commit suicide.

I’ll cry, until I stop.

And I’ll keep taking my meds, in spite of.

And I’ll keep seeing my Psychiatrist.

I’ll keep doing this thing called,

Life.

‘Til I can’t.

Yvette