Fall easy, hard and long

falling in and out of love

I remember my very first crush. It was my third grade teacher.

Who looked like, Vanessa Williams!

My second crush, involved two.

Saretta. We lived on the same block and went to the same elementary school.

And Miss Brown, who lived around the corner and taught me how to Crochet and Knit.

My last crush, became my mate, for fifteen years.

Reoccurring dreams, Seasons and dates, make it difficult to forget her and to move on.

I know, I will love her forever.

I just want to stop mourning the lost.

I thank my Pastor and Friend, Rev Shorb-Sterling. Who’s retiring soon.

Besides my dad, She was the only person that empathized with my many challenges.

So much so, she supplied the words for me, when I was unable to express how I felt.

Something I lacked from family and friends of more than thirty years.

I will miss her tremendously.

I love you Rev Sue!

I pray we all have the Peace this World needs to heal.

God Bless!

Yvette

“Thank you Lord”

He knows what I need and
I’m grateful!

I’ve been needing some, Alone time, for a long time.

But things kept happening, to prevent that.

I’ve always enjoyed, my time alone.

It’s necessary. As it is, for most folks.

But I don’t live alone.

I would, If I could afford to.

I decided (planned for years) to convert my van, into a little camper.

[Years ago started buying vans. Because of the CFS. But then I began to think, I’d always have a place to sleep, if I became homeless]

I’ve been trying to get it done, for two years.

[Offers of help…]
I was spending the weekend at a friend’s.

I woke up, yesterday morning.

Saturday and drove straight to Home Depot.

And in the parking lot, I measure my van floor and went to collect materials, for my bed platform.

I then put down the floor.

And make the platform.

Zero Carpentry skills!

I didn’t go to bed thinking, “I’m going to Home Depot…..”

I simply got up and did it.

[God]

When it was time for me to go home, I didn’t want to go.

But then I get there.

And I park.

And I am grateful.

Because it’s now, 8 at night.

The temperature is nice.

[Cold prevented me from staying in the van]

And I’m having my,

Alone time.

“Thank you, Lord”

Yvette

Chain of Events

Yesterday, Having spent, most of the day with her. I tell Rev, I’d see her, for sure, Sunday.

She had picked me up and had driven, through three or four counties. But she asks me, if I was up to visiting, our friend in Mt. Airy.  Another, in the hospital.

[Ever mindful of my issues, with fatigue. She was the one, to put into words, procisely how I felt]

Today, Saturday. I got up late (for me) around eight a.m.

I was anticipating a friend’s arrival. One who was kind enough to bring me items, I had stored at theirs.

For years!

[How blessed am I, to have people like this, in my life]

One thing, leads to another.

I start to clear space for the things that she’s bringing.

And cleaning up and doing laundry.

I’m exhausted and my back hurts.

[Bipolar, Mania forces me to work, to exhaustion. Or until my back gives out. But, what do you do with the brain? It won’t stop thinking, won’t rest?]

I have my last load in the dryer.

I think of my dad, As I make my bed.

As I fold, Two extra blankets.

I smile. Because my dad, is a bed hog!

I think about some of the things we laughed about, the last time he was here.

I told him, he had eaten all his candy.

He says “I don’t remember eating it”

I then say “Because you don’t remember, doesn’t mean, you didn’t eat it”

And we laughed.

[I no longer worry, that he forgets…that he may forget me]

He said another time “I don’t remember”

I said ” And that’s alright, Right Daddy?

He said “That’s right baby”

Blessings!

Yvette