All that matters

I believed, the things/people I loved the most, would be taken from me.

[It seemed logical, that I proclaimed Atheism. (Briefly. A year) after being raped]

As you age and ail, I worried, I needed money to make sure, the rest of your life, was the best of your life.

[I feared my own illnesses, would prevent me from spending, quality time with you]

You began coughing during dinner.

We watched TV, in bed. We talked. You coughed.

You say “I had a great time”

[You talked and laughed with your new friends, in the living room. Debbie and I, are in the kitchen. And she’s already inviting you over again]

I agree, recounting the Thanksgiving dinner, Debbie prepared for us and her family/friends.

You say “We did?”

We watch more TV. You cough.

You ask me “Who lives here?” I say “I do.”

You cough more. I make you some hot tea.

You say that’s better. Still coughing,

You finally fall asleep, at 4am.

As I watch you sleep, I’m grateful.

[Remembering as a little girl, I wrapped my leg around you, so I could sleep]

As I spend more time with you, I’m grateful.

It no longer matters, that you won’t remember.

I will.

All that matters is,

this precious time,

I have with you.

I love you Daddy. Yvette

Author: My Life with mental illness

I have dealt with depression, most of my life and I've tried different antidepressant. With the right diagnosis and med mix, I have lost 40 pounds. And I am managing, my mental illnesses.

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